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The pressure starts really young and it goes your whole life, but it’s perhaps most pronounced when you’re graduating from school, right? Everyone says, “Wow, the world's at your feet! What are you gonna do now?” And it’s so intimidating, it's like picking a major for life. You know, I had a hard enough time picking a major for four years and I changed that once, if not twice. I mean it was like just intimidating, right? And this compelling I mean this really, you know, forceful cultural imperative to choose your passion, it’s stressful to me, but it’s not just me, it’s everyone I talk to agrees with me. The woman who sold me this dress. I told her what I needed the dress for, what I was talking about and she said, “Oh my gosh, I... I really need to hear this talk, because I just graduate from school. My friends and I, we don’t know what we’re passionate about, we don’t know what we supposed to do.” I’m leery of passion for a few reasons. But one of them is that passion is not a plan, it’s a feeling. And feelings change. They do. You can be passionate about a person one day, and a job, and then not passionate the next. We know this and yet we continue to use passion as the yardstick to judge everything by, instead of seeing passion for what it really is: the fire that ignites when you start rubbing sticks together.

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The pressure / starts really young / and / it goes your whole life, / but it’s perhaps most pronounced when you’re graduating from school, / right? // Everyone says, “Wow, / the world's at your feet! // What are you gonna do now?” // And it’s so intimidating, / it's like / picking a major / for life. // You know, / I had a hard enough time picking a major / for four years / and I changed that once, / if not twice. // I mean it was like / just intimidating, / right? // And this compelling / I mean this / really, you know, / forceful cultural imperative to choose your passion, / it’s stressful to me, / but it’s not just me, / it’s everyone I talk to agrees with me. // The woman who sold me this dress. // I told her what I needed the dress for, / what I was talking about / and she said, / “Oh my gosh, / I... / I really need to hear this talk, / because I just graduate from school. // My friends and I, / we don’t know what we’re passionate about, / we don’t know what we supposed to do.” // I’m leery of passion for a few reasons. // But one of them / is that / passion is not a plan, / it’s a feeling. // And feelings change. // They do. // You can be passionate about a person one day, / and a job, / and then not passionate the next. // We know this / and yet we continue to use passion as the yardstick / to judge everything by, / instead of seeing passion for what it really is: / the fire that ignites / when you start rubbing sticks together. //

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Anyway, I was such a mess when I was in my twenties, such a mess. I was anxious and depressed and had no life to speak of, I was temping to keep my options open, and I was sitting around at night in my underwear watching Seinfeld reruns. Actually I still do that, that’s not the worst thing in the world to do. It’s fine. But I called my mother every night crying and I was turning away perfectly good full-time jobs. Why? Because I was afraid. I was sure that I would pick the wrong one and get on the wrong train headed to the wrong future. My mother begged me, she said, “Please, take a job, any job. You’re not going to be stuck, you’re stuck now! You don’t create your life first, and then live it. You create it by living it, not agonizing about it.” She’s right, she’s always right. And so I took a full-time job as an assistant at a management consulting firm, where I knew nothing about nothing. Okay. Zero. Except I knew I had a reason to get up in the morning, get showered, leave the house, people who were waiting for me when I got there and I got a paycheck every two weeks. And that is as good a reason to take a job as any. Did I know that if I want to be an office administrator for the rest of my life? No! I had no idea! Truly! But this idea that everything you're supposed to do should fit into this passion vertical is unrealistic. And I’ll say it - elitist. You show me someone who washes windows for a living and I will bet you a million dollars it’s not because he has a passion for clean glass.

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Anyway, / I was such a mess when I was in my twenties, / such a mess. // I was anxious / and depressed / and had no life to speak of, / I was temping / to keep my options open, / and I was sitting around at night in my underwear watching Seinfeld reruns. // Actually, / I still do that, / that’s not the worst thing in the world to do. // It’s fine. // But I called my mother / every night crying / and I was turning away / perfectly good / full-time jobs. // Why? // Because I was afraid. // I was sure that I would pick the wrong one / and get on the wrong train / headed to the wrong future. // My mother begged me, / she said, / “Please, / take a job, / any job. / You’re not going to be stuck, / you’re stuck now! // You don’t / create your life first, / and then live it. // You create it / by living it, / not agonizing about it.” // She’s right, / she’s always right. // And so I took a full-time job / as an assistant / at a management consulting firm, / where I knew nothing about nothing. // Okay. // Zero. // Except / I knew I had a reason to get up in the morning, / get showered, / leave the house, / people who were waiting for me when I got there / and I got a paycheck every two weeks. // And that / is as good a reason to take a job as any. // Did I know / that if I want to be an office administrator for the rest of my life? // No! // I had no idea! // Truly! // But this idea that everything you're supposed to do / should fit into this passion vertical / is unrealistic. // And I’ll say it / - elitist. // You show me someone who washes windows for a living / and I will bet you a million dollars / it’s not because / he has a passion for clean glass. //