We tried teaching people conflict resolution,/ coaching,/ and mentoring,/ and we gave them checklists,/ and processes,/ and tools.// Bottom-line:/ none of these created the sustainable improvement/ that we were looking for.// So,/ when we were looking for that improvement,/ we decided to step back/ and ask a different question:/ “What do top performers do?”.// Finally,/ we found one skill/ that was common to all top performers.// They developed ability to ask good questions.// Now,/ I know that sounds simple,/ but what they asked/ and how they asked was very different.// For example,/ many of them were able to suspend their judgment/ just long enough to understand someone else's perspective,/ and in doing so,/ they were able to reduce the conflict,/ develop a common language,/ and create a shared vision.// So as the situation evolved,/ so did their thinking.// Now,/ I know we all ask a lot of questions,/ and that's a really good thing.// We want people to be asking lots and lots of questions.// But what we found,/ however,/ is that most questions are safe,/ that is,/ they surface what is already/ seen or understood.// They lead to regurgitated ideas and opinions.// In other words,/ most questions that people ask/ really/ surface what is already known.//Top performers,/ however,/ they ask questions that go deep.// They ask questions that move us from/ automatic and reactionary thinking/ to deep thinking.// They ask questions that inspire creativity,/ fuel passion,/ and lead to profound ideas,/ and most importantly,/ they ask questions that spur people into action.// In other words,/ they ask questions that/ demystify the unknown,/ and in doing so,/ open up an ocean of possibilities.// Now, our brain is an amazing searchable data base,/ linking emotions,/ memories,/ events,/ and experiences together/ to form answers/ to our endless questions.// The success of a good answer,/ however,/ relies on the words we choose.// Our words have an amazing power on our brain./ How we use words/ in framing our questions/ is what differentiates a good question/ from a bad question.// Let me give you an example.// When we saw people put into the simulation,/ or confronted with these challenges,/ and they started to make decisions.// The teams that were struggling would ask,/ "What should we do?"/ and it was almost as though/ the options in front of them were just narrowed down.// They became very short-term focused,/ whereas the other teams/ would ask,/ "What could we do?"/ and it was like the ocean of possibilities/ opened up to them.//