Often,/ we kidnap ourselves / from the lives that we actually want/ because we think a different path / is gonna help us survive, / get by, / pay our bills, / or meet our needs in the world // I pulled out my journal, / and I wrote at the top of it, / "I'm / my own / kidnapper." // I listed / all of the ways over the years that I silenced the truth of what I actually want, / all of the times that I took myself captive / on soul-crushing journeys / that I didn't even wanna be on. // I thought about how so many of us choose / majors in college or career paths / that we don't even wanna be on, / because we think it will help us / survive, / get by, / or meet our needs in the world.// But it doesn't have to be that way. // I encourage you / to ask yourself, / "Where / am I kidnapping myself / rom the life / that I really want?" // "How / am I giving away my power, / getting into fear, / just to meet my needs in the world?" // When we go into fear, / we give away our power / and we disconnect from who we really are / and what we really want. // But as a career coach, / I've learned that there are three / key steps that you can take / right now / to make what I love to call / a "you-turn," / which is the decision to get out of fear / and come home to yourself. // So the first step / is to do / a self-audit. // Really ask yourself, / "Where / am I holding myself captive?" // This means being honest with yourself / about where you are, / what's working for you,/ and what isn't. // And if you think about it,/ we come into the world, / our natural state / is with so much love, / creativity / - think about kids; / they have inspiration / - and yet over time we're taught to fear. // And fear is a necessary inner alarm system / that we all need to survive in the physical world.//

Think about it. / We learn / to look both ways before we cross the street. // We learn / not to touch the stove when it's hot. // We learn / not to talk to strangers. // But over time, / we get hurt. // Life throws us curveballs. // We learn to stop taking risks / and start being afraid. // We get afraid to put ourselves out there. // We start calling ourselves / "practical" / or "realistic" / for making choices that seem / "responsible" / when really / we're just so scared / of criticism. // And if we're being really honest with ourselves, / people who call themselves realists / are often just dreamers / who got their hearts broken / somewhere along the way. // So how do you make a you-turn? // You do a self-audit. // You come home to yourself. // And that's why one of my favorite questions to ask people / is "What do you know / that you wish / you didn't know?" // What do you know / that you wish / you didn't know? // Maybe some of you know / that you're hiding from the truth. // Deep down, / you know you're hiding from the truth. // Maybe you're hiding from the fact that you hate your job, / but you don't wanna admit it because you're scared / and you don't know where to go next. // Or maybe / you're hiding from the fact that you married the wrong person, / but you're scared / to admit it because it's going to unravel your life / to get a divorce. // Or maybe / you know that something is going on with your health, / but you're scared / to go to the doctor / because you don't wanna hear the diagnosis. // Whatever it is, / tap into what's deeply / true for you, / seeing things as they are / - not worse than they are, / not better than they are, / but as they actually are. // In order to figure out what you really want, / you need to see the truth / of where you are. //