What is the video all about?

When we talk about confidence, it's so many things. It has to do (1) , the way we present, how we look, where's our chin. Where are the eyes (2) ? Our gestures are loose, but they're smoother. As we walk about, we walk as though we are (3) . I'm walking out to shake your hand, or I'm (4) , or I'm walking to where I'm gonna sit. So the less confident we are, the less eye contact we make, the less confident we are, the (5) we are to look about. You know, when I look at someone I admire, like Colin Powell, when he walks onto a stage. Even before he speaks, he has total command of the room. And he does that because he brings two things into this equation: one is (6) of knowledge and experience. Plus, he has shaped and defined himself into a statesman. "We gotta think of America as a family, where every member of the family cares about every other member of the family." I think sometimes people make mistakes like (7) , or theatrical displays of power, as confidence. Confidence can be very quiet. Jane Goodall, here's this ethologist, (8) , very mild. And yet wherever she goes, she commands the room. One of the things you notice is they sort of have this command of themselves, and in doing so, that command (9) . The other thing that confident people realize is, (10) of leadership. If you're in charge, you're in charge of time. "I'm gonna take my time (11) ." "I'm gonna take my time to answer your question." "I will answer it (12) , manner, and tone that I choose." And in doing that, we are demonstrating that we are confident, and in control.

Where do we get that (1) ? Where do we get those confident gestures? This is what's called "socialization." We notice the principal who acts this way, we like this leader because of this or that trait. So I try to (2) , and say, "This is a shortcut. And if I have to (3) , that's what high-status people do. If I had to change my (4) , in this society, and then that's what I'm gonna have to do. That doesn't mean it changes me completely. It just means that this is what is (5) , and this is what I want to achieve at this moment in time." I think of Cary Grant, an individual born in the UK, grew up very poor. And as he said in his biography, "I became Cary Grant. I adopted all the behaviors that I saw from (6) ." "Let's think about that, but make up your mind." And it is difficult to prescribe this, but one of the easiest things that we can do is, you know, if you're a woman, maybe you want to model yourself (7) , Cate Blanchett, or some other actor, say, you know, when they're being interviewed, how do they look? They look so confident. They look interesting. They have such (8) . You know, we're not born this way. These are things that we (9) , and say, "How do I want to be perceived? And what can I do to achieve that?" Are there better behaviors that you can do? Here's a simple one, how many of you, somebody says, "Where'd they go?" And you go like this. And as (10) , this is one of the most hated signs around the world. And yet, if we just go like this, "He went that way." We're already (11) . Little things. I tell the story often of when I first came into law enforcement, they said, "Well, you know, you've got to get out there and (12) ." And the first time I went out there, and my voice just went really high,"Stop, you're under arrest." That sounds horrible. And you have to work at having that command presence, where you say, "Stop right there, don't move." That's (13) , yeah, but it's what is needed.